Sugar coated poison

Scenario 1
He = Sorry my battery died and so got disconnected.
She = No worries.
He = Thanks. You are sweet.
Scenario 2
She = Listen, I apologize for going weak today.
He = Don’t be. I wanted it that way too.
She = Why?
He = Just like that. Because you are sweet.
Scenario 3
He = Sweetness, I think its time.
She = For?
He = For us to go our own ways. For everyone’s good.
She = Hmmm….sure. Good bye.
He = Thanks. You’re a sweetheart.

You don't think such scenarios exist? Well, I do. I can vouch for them.

and before I come to an end..just one more line that I always say to everyone that i know - am not Sweet. I am just plain selfish.

The End!

Disclaimer: I started it and it had to end and so here it is..but I don't want to write such stories again - especially those which have any kind of resemblance to a real life scenario...it does not leave me feeling good...and so while I conclude the 'Fire & Ice' post, am sorry if it hurts you somewhere.

Sometimes, just sometimes, you find the meaning to the words you just threw up in the air. A similar thing happened with me as well. While I was writing my posty on Fire & Ice, I was happy with what I created – it almost looked like a real story to me. Except, the end of the story. I did not have an end to define for the story. Agreed the fire was there. I also agreed on the icy chill that followed. But to question the chill was more than important. Why was there a chill? I stopped. I did not have an answer. I let the story be. I just let it be, concluding with a sentence that we will see where the story goes.

Just before I went to bed the same evening – I knew the end of that story. Sometimes, just sometimes, you find the meaning to the words you throw up in the air. Sometimes, there are people around to show you or rather lead you to the end of a story. I was unfortunately lucky this time. Although it was a fiction for me but I guess it wasn’t so for someone out there. What follows is this:

Lack of expression was the key, the reason, and ‘the be all and end all’ of the story. The fire, though ablaze, wasn’t ready to be seen, to be felt, to be heard, to just be there. Laying blames on each other, not realizing the feeling within, they just drifted apart, picking up their lost pieces. Or perhaps they just stopped caring for their relationship. They did not realise that no relationship can ever work on an automatic mode. You have to work towards nurturing, caring, and supporting a relationship. "When someone hurts us, we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it.". They did the reverse of this. Those markings on the stone are all that is left of their relationship.

The worst you can do in a dying relationship is to believe that it is dying.

There was nothing more for me to state – it comes straight from someone who goes through the pain and hence I leave it at that. God bless.

(P.S:I am sorry for the ‘quote’ unquote here.)

Fire & Ice - To be contd.

There was some kind of ‘FIRE of the sorts’ between the two. At the onset, so it seemed.

They had heard about the chemistry, biology, and physics that happened in relationships – and I would lay a thousand bucks on the fact that they witnessed it in many of their previous relationships. When they met each other, they of course denied of any such science or scientific combos, ever before, with anyone else. That was obvious, wasn’t it?

For this one seemed just the Right one - a kind of bond that never before was felt and shared. She would melt at the thought of him – his talks, his gestures, his thoughtful self, his intellect, his maturity, his oh-so-never-ending care and concern, his arrogance – just everything appealed more than anything else in the world. Did he feature as a Knight in the shining armor? Oh or well perhaps may be that striking similarity in his behavior to the Mills and Boon hero, she read when she was a teen, did it. For a while, it actually did not matter if she was at a stage in her life when at least she knew the things that she did not want in a man. He just seemed made up of the bestest of the best. Wildest of thoughts in the most subdued manner were no longer subdued within. They just got busy driving her to the wilderness unknown. Soaring desires. Start of yet another new life.

He was an equal partner in this cruise – sailing along with blazing dreams, to a journey to a place unknown, convincing him that he needed that companionship. He had predetermined ways of living life – you lived only once and you had every right to experience the unexplored. With a creative bend towards life and other dealings, it was inherent in him. At a time when life trespassed with a big B (read bored!), there was a welcoming sunshine. Little different than usual though, but he was ready to grab it. Opportunist. He believed in living each moment as it came. Besides, this was close to a long cherished dream. She drove him crazy – days and nights, altogether. Those traits – strong, powerful, creative, controlled, romantic, and adventurous – were never before in a bundle like this. They were too good for his ego. The crusade began.

...and then there was ICE – amidst the fire. Even before the fire set ablaze, the icy chill shadowed. This time no situational set backs, no confusions, no anything else. This time it was something beyond all this. This time it was…this time it indeed was…

Okay stop – before we conclude…the current state:

She: Perplexed yet quiet. Holding on to faith. Ready for ‘I-would-do-anything-for-you’. Anxious for the Endeavour, however; whatever it takes.

He: Aloof. Quiet. Dreaming on knowing how difficult it was. Waiting to show life the way he wanted - to her. Taking it as it came – one moment at a time.

And now to the much awaited conclusion... Smooth sailing, was it? We will see…

Here Goes Life..

Her

Leaving her whole world, in anticipation of a love, that was never hers – was her story of life, in a sentence. The more elaborative it gets, the more it fills her with pain.

She cut the last thread which kept the both of them swinging in false hopes and fake dreams? It was a dangerous liaison, right from the start – she knew it. But she was too blind in her belief for love that she chose to ignore those facts. Maturity comes with age and experience. She should have known that. No, she should have acknowledged that because she knew that anyways. Ignorance is bliss they say and she took it for real.

It was too late yet not as much. She could try to gather the lost pieces and start another time. With that single thread of hope. Of that of the love. Love - that one feeling which remained with her. She believed in love.

Him

One look at her and he knew he had lost her. From the time she walked into his life, until today, when she had gone – there was hope, which gave him the strength to move on relentlessly. Without the need to turn back and see if he had taken a wrong path and without having to wait awhile and ponder if he would be able to do justice to what he had stepped ahead to.

Today his mind was a pool of swirling thoughts – disturbing his sanity. Because today, she cut short all hopes. Today, she decided to return back to her old world. He kept wondering why. And then as if he had found the answer to it all. Suddenly he knew it all. He knew where he had gone wrong. Sometimes, what you thought right would not necessarily be right. There was a difference of opinion – in what you thought and planned to what God thought and planned. Underestimating God's will was not the best thing you could do.

So he decided, after brooding on it for a considerable time. He had to let go of this life. He had to rise and shine, once again. This time - without her. Just to make peace with himself. Never to feel love again. He was done with it.

...and Life carried on.