Sunday, November 12, 2006

My wounded soul!!!

...while my protagonist prepares herself to live the life she so wants to...let's talk about love...:-) I must be crazy to talk this and here.
It doesn't matter.
I ain't no God.
I have my needs.
I don't care what people think reading this. But I feel completely love lorn. I guess there are days in your life when you are on a low self esteem, when you yourself stop loving yourself for whatever reasons. When you feel so out of love. I feel outta love. And quite much. So much that I actually detest it. I wonder why..but I hate when I don't love myself, when there is nothing good that i can relate to that i would have done, when there are mistakes that i find in myself, when interestingly, people around me also start finding faults. I don't find love around me but more than that, I don't find it within me, for myself.
Reminds me, and I gotta mention this..Is there some kind of an artificial world that I am living in? I have to spend some time thinking this....I am real, my needs are real, my love is real, my faith in God and humans is real. Then what is unreal and artificial?
I am lost - in a conversation. A conversation with my soul. I need to nurse my soul because I have a feeling it is wounded somewhere. There is loneliness, there is insecurity, and there is unrest.
I know tomorrow morning, I will soar high with my ambitions in life and a desire to live a peacful life - I also know there are few blue days when you are lost and down on your knees...this too shall pass, as they say. I know I will have that strength. But today, I am a wounded soul. And I have so many reasons to feel that way. You know, sometimes, it is good to pity yourself, and let yourself know that you are weak from within. Atleast, you get off that feeling of a superwoman.. ;-)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You for sure have been running too busy to even look up around. Else, how could this love lorn feeling find a way.

Artificial world? Well, when Mahatama Gandhi and others were sacrificing their lives for their dream of a free India, were they living in an artificial...unreal world. Who knows?

All of us live in a world of our own beliefs and yes, sometimes the enforced environment. Real or unreal...do we really care?

Do agree...your wounds are yours and you alone need to nurse them. If I may say, we all are selfish and just need happy faces around :-)

That was it... said...

:-) Awesome!!! Never a moment passes by when I don't feel your love around me and never a time in my life when I am sad and I don't have you around....I guess I was really lost in myself and perhaps busy to reach you out in the moment of sadness.

And lady, where have you been hiding your expressions for so long? I am impressed with the way you communicate.

God bless. Without you, I wouldn't be...!!